breaking hearts has never looked so cool [ 18.03.04 - 1:01 reading love letters, placing them in a box underneath my bed ] when will this stop hurting? i had my first caramel latte since i left victoria, & the taste brought tidal waves of memories over me. dan & i would meet after he got off work to bike to a chain coffee joint near the library. i would sip lattes and smoke, & he would have hot chocolate with whipped cream. we would just sit & talk & discuss our days & i absolutely adored those moments. we had a mutual home to go to, but just being out in the sea air, our cheeks red, clutching our paper cups to warm our hands was magnificent for me. this movie eternal sunshine for the spotless mind (that i'm very excited to see) makes me long for the possibility that all my memories of daniel can be erased. every smell, sight, sound, taste, feeling that now makes my stomach drop in painful nostalgia be just...gone. i wouldn't have the struggle jim carrey is seeming to have, but i think i'm already as crazy. i was riding the lrt the other day, & beside me sat a man who, in the reflection in the window across from us, look exactly like dan. i had to swallow hard not to cry. i don't know when this is supposed to stop hurting, but i hope it's soon. remember our first apartment, our couch was never big enough for two, but we'd fall asleep in each other's arms & wake up on the floor, & i knew it was made for me & you. if only i had one wish, i'd want a million billion lifetimes that i could share with you. fall in love with you, again and again. [ previous entry - next entry ]

navigate> !new !old !really old !profile !notes !diaryland je t'adore> whinyemosara xtearitupx scientifics stoopib dre2600